22 Weeks!

WOW! It's been 10 weeks since I updated everyone via my blog! There has been so much going on though! Ryan and I bought our first home and moved into it, which kinda kept me busy and I didn't have my computer up or anything so I couldn't really blog haha. There was other stuff in there too, my college graduation, family coming to town from Texas, a wedding, and work on top of all of that. So I figured the best time to update you would be this week! Its the first week of summer and I've got some time on my hands!

Symptoms: Wellll...I feel like I am doing MUCH better! I am still really tired all the time, but being able to just sit at home over the weekend and relax has helped with that. Other than that there isn't much to complain about!

OH! I had to come back up here and edit this part! One of the BIGGEST things happening to me right now is that I am forgetting EV-E-RY-THING!!!! I haven't felt so dumb in all my life! I keep joking that this baby is gonna be a genius with how stupid this pregnancy is making me feel! 

What I'm Eating/Craving: I'm not eating anything out of the ordinary...just the stuff I normally eat. I have craved a buffalo chicken sandwich, that new Breyers Gelato ice cream (omgahhh so DELISH), and I crave BBQ ALL THE TIME!! I can't wait to go to Texas in September and have some real BBQ!

Weight Gain: I was trying to use the same scale for tracking my weight, but I packed mine and it's still packed. As of the last doctors appointment at 20 weeks my total weight gain was 5 pounds. I'm okay with that I think, I've only got a few more months left and I haven't been binging on really anything EXCEPT the soda left over from my graduation party...oops! A little bit of whatever I'm craving or feeling like I have to eat goes a long way with me, so I don't feel like I have to deny myself anything.

What I'm Wearing: I still don't have much maternity clothes, but luckily just about everything sold right now can work as maternity clothes so I've just been buying stuff that fits haha! Maternity jeans are a must though! I only have a few pairs, but I'm off for summer so I'm really not that worried about it!

Mood: Pretty happy and content about 95% of the time, but I have my moments. I'm only human ya know! 

Due Date: Still October 13, 2014, but the delivery date as of right now is in the week before IF I make it without going into labor before then.

Next Prenatal Appointment: The end of this month, but I can't remember when, there's a card in my purse to remind me haha!

Gender Predictions: I have pictures of my belly at around 15/16 weeks pregnant with Max and around 20 weeks pregnant with Bella and the difference between the way I carried them really shocked me! So once I started showing a lot more I really started to think I was having a boy, butttt at the same time I was so sick I couldn't imagine a sweet little boy doing that to his momma! So at 15 weeks I went and had an ultrasound done, with my eyes closed the whole time, and had the tech put the gender results in an envelope so Ryan, the kids, and I could find out together. (Ryan was at work when I went.) The next morning we did a little gender reveal and had my friend/coworker take pictures of our reaction. It was soooo FUN to see my kids and ESPECIALLY Ryan react to the fact that the balloons were blue and that we were having a BOY!

I didn't care if we were having a boy or a girl really, but seeing the pure joy that was on my husband's face sealed the deal for me and I was pumped immediately that we were going to have another son. Max was soooooo excited because he just wanted to have a little brother and even though Gabriella was saying she wanted a sister she was just as excited to find out it was a boy. I think she is just happy to be having a baby in the house in general!

Baby Names: Our baby name is picked! We aren't going to be sharing it though just yet. I always have a weird thing with names and I like to kinda just keep it to myself until the baby is really here. I think there are friends of mine who already know and some close family that I've told, but I'm not ready to tell the internet.

Looking Forward To: Getting this house UNPACKED this weekend so I can start painting the baby room and start working on getting it ready for our baby boy!

I thought I would go ahead and add a picture to this post! I think that I am most confident when I am pregnant and a lot of it has to do with the fact that my husband absolutely LOVES it when I'm pregnant, so I've been taking a picture at the turn of every week. I don't mind my stretch marks, they're kinda like battle wounds for me, but dang I need some sun!

Talk to you soon,

J

12 Weeks!

Holy smokes! It's the last week of the first trimester! WOO HOO!! Come Monday next week I'm gonna be walking around looking like I just won the lottery!

Symptoms: Dare I say...the constant nausea is wearing off. KNOCK ON WOOD RIGHT NOW!! I am still getting sick randomly, but at least it isn't the all day long, why does this baby hate me, someone save me sickness. I am still extremely tired most of the time though.

What I'm Eating/Craving: No actual cravings just yet. I am finally able to drink tea again so I haven't been turning to soda anymore thank goodness! I am excited that I have been able to eat a wider variety of foods lately though!

Weight Gain: No weight gain since the last update. Still sitting at 1 pound gained in the first trimester! 

What I'm Wearing: I'm having to wear maternity bottoms now, which I don't have too many of. Looks like I'll be making some online purchases here pretty soon!

Mood: Happy most of the time. I was under a lot of stress the last few weeks so I was pretty crabby for a few days, but I think I'm doing better now.  

Due Date: Still October 13, 2014.

Next Prenatal Appointment: April 28th. My appointment today went great and I got to see the baby stretching and moving all around! I swear it already looks like Gabriella from the side! 

Gender Predictions: I still have no clue! Most days I think it's a girl, but then other days I second guess myself.

Baby Names: We are definitely still struggling with a girl name! Leave any suggestions that you may have! I am totally open to them!

Looking Forward To: Finding out the gender! I am going to go at 15 weeks and pay to have an ultrasound done. My OBGYN doesn't tell the sex at all for some reason so I'm going to have to make it happen myself!

We got 3 huge boxes of diapers today in the mail from my grandma and they are actually the first baby anything that we have in our house for this baby and it seriously made me so excited and made everything feel even more real! I am so in love with this baby already its gonna be hard for me to have patience for the next 6 months!

Talk to you soon,

J

10 Weeks!

Finally in the double digits of pregnancy! The time is ticking by so slowly right now and that doesn't really surprise me because pregnancy goes by so slowly no matter how much you enjoy it. I cant even think of anything else that lasts for only 9 (or 10 depending on who you ask) months but seems to last an entire lifetime.

Symptoms: Still feeling nauseous 99% of the time and actually started throwing up last week. Wahhh! Really tired at random times during the day which leads to me not getting much done around the house.

What I'm Eating/Craving: I don't think I'm really having cravings for anything yet...except soda! I hate it so much, but I broke down and had three fountain Dr. Peppers last week! Luckily on Saturday I didn't finish the one I got that day because I started to feel too sick. I'm hoping I can go back to no caffeine. I'm not really eating different because nothing sounds good...ever. I can't wait to be enjoying food again.

Weight Gain: Well this week I am actually down 3 pounds so total weight gain so far is only 1 pound! I'll be really excited to get out of the first trimester with only 1 pound gained! 

What I'm Wearing: Still wearing my regular clothes most of the time, but I have started wearing a pair of maternity jeans that are too comfy to keep put away any longer. 

Mood: Really emotional all the time, really stressed out about the rest of the year and all of the different things going on, but I'm feeling pretty happy most of the time.  

Due Date: Still October 13, 2014.

Next Prenatal Appointment: March 31st! Can't wait!

Gender Predictions: I'm actually floundering between boy or girl! I just can't tell anymore! I feel like only a daughter would make a pregnancy so hard, but then again my face is a lot clearer than it normally is and I don't know if I should contribute that to my new skincare routine or to the fact that its a boy. Gahhh!

Baby Names: I've never had any problem thinking of names before I was pregnant or even when I was pregnant with my other kids, but suddenly there isn't a baby girl name that Ryan and I can really agree on and stick with! Naming kids is so important to me and I put a lot of thought into how it will impact their future and all of that kind of stuff so this time around I guess it's just gonna be a longer process than it has been before. 

Looking Forward To: I am still so excited for the end of the first trimester! I can't wait to feel like a human again and not like the hosting body for an alien parasite!

It seems like this post is a lot of complaining, but I have to be honest right? I am so so so very blessed to be having another baby, but it doesn't mean that the first trimester doesn't still suck for me! 

Talk to you soon,

J

8 Weeks 1 Day

What a journey it has been to get to this blog post! 

Ryan and I have been wanting to expand our family for some time now, but we finally made the leap and I had my IUD removed (TMI?) the first week of November 2012 (!!!). We thought it was the perfect time and just assumed that I would get pregnant pretty quickly because I was a lot healthier than I was before, the effects from the IUD disappear almost immediately after being removed, and we had been praying about it. We had no idea it would take over a year to finally get a positive pregnancy test! 

After many months of tears (from me of course haha) and frustration, and lots and lots of praying we are so so so thrilled to be expecting another little baby Hill! So without further ado, here is my first official pregnancy update! I'm not sure what I will be calling them yet, or if I will just title them with how far along I am. I think I am going to update every two weeks until its starts to get more interesting haha! I have been wanting to do a pregnancy blog since I first started blogging 100 years ago! 

First Signs of Pregnancy: Super tender breasts and I was yawning constantly while I was running on the treadmill! I didn't really think anything of it at first until a few days later when it wouldn't stop!

First Positive Pregnancy Test: February 10! I took another one on the 11th and 12th too, just to be sure! 

First Prenatal Appointment: March 3! So exciting! I nearly cried at the sound of the baby's heart beat and the fluttering on screen! 

Pregnancy Symptoms: SUPER NAUSEOUS all of the time, extreme exhaustion, major food aversions (from just about all food), and I can't drink anything but water. I was already off of caffeine and sodas for the last six months or so, but I was drinking decaf iced tea with a packet of Truvia, now I cant even stomach that, its ice water all day everyday. 

Weight Gain: EEK! Not much, 4 pounds. I'm going to be trying to keep that number pretty low this time around! The first two I kinda went crazy and indulged in everything I desired, but it took a long time to get all that weight off so I don't want to go through all that again.

What I'm Wearing: My regular clothes most of the time, except with the addition of a Belly Band. I don't feel like I actually look pregnant just yet, but I am definitely showing A LOT faster this time around. 

Mood: Varying between elated with life to beyond miserable. Being as sick as I am this time its been quite hard for me to find the joy in everyday things. Seeing the baby yesterday though turned me around and reminded me why I am voluntarily going through this. Added to that is a twinge of fear of the future, I am terrified of the delivery, terrified of working while having a baby, terrified of basically everything that comes with adding another person into the mix. 

Due Date: October 13, 2014! I know I will deliver before then, c section and all, but I am very excited that its within the same year of getting pregnant because then it doesn't seem as far away! (In my head at least!)

Gender Predictions: I am really leaning towards another girl. I just have a feeling that Max will be my only son.  

Baby Names: We've already got two names picked out for boys, but we cant agree on a girl name! I don't think we are going to share the name until after the baby is born though! 

Looking Forward To: The end of the first trimester! Not only will I feel so much better to be out of the dreaded danger zone, I'm excited for the calmness of the second trimester. I can't wait to not feel sick anymore! 

I think that's it for now, folks! I'll share a belly picture once I feel like I look more pregnant that like I just had a big dinner! Let me know if there is anything I am leaving out that you might be interested in!

Talk to you soon,

J

Let Me Clear My Mind

I think a silent blog is a sign of a clear mind. I haven't had much to say in a while, because there really isn't anything new that's been going on. I wish I could say the same is true right at this moment, but it isn't.

On April 4th of this year I lost one of my little brothers suddenly. He was only 22 years old and left behind a baby less than a year old. I've been wanting to open up about my feelings and the struggle that I have gone through because maybe it can help someone else, but its hard. Its hard to even think about letting the world know how I really feel and opening up to strangers and people who might even like the fact that I am having a hard time.

I never thought that at 27 years old I would have to know what it feels like to lose someone I love so much, and I never ever ever thought I would lose a sibling. I am the oldest one out of me and my 6 siblings...I should have been the one to die first, when we were all old and grey. Knowing that I will never see him again kills me. I didn't have as much time with him as the rest of my family did, because I've always lived so far away, but he was still my brother and we did still have some time together. This is the first time in my life that I have had to deal with the death of someone that I have loved. I've known people who have passed, I've known people who have loved someone who passed, but I have never actually felt it before. Now I do. I think of my brother before I finally fall asleep, I dream about him more often than not, and when I wake up I think of him. My only comfort when I'm feeling especially down and sad is that he isn't in pain anymore. I know he is in heaven with God, and he's happy. He's probably so happy to be able to live somewhere that he isn't plagued by his troubles. I'm pretty sure he's probably fishing every day, and catching one every time he throws his line out.

No one is perfect and every single person in this world has their share of problems and my brother wasn't immune to that. My brother was a kind soul. He was gentle, sensitive, caring, and so very funny. Losing him has really opened my eyes. I have always been a family person, I would rather spend all of my time with my family than any other people in the world, but now I have to. Realizing that I didn't really have as much time with John Phillip as I wish I had cuts me right to the core. I want to know that at the end of the day, I have made every effort to be as close to my family as possible. Does that mean I am going to be the annoying big sister that calls her little brothers and sister all the time? Absolutely. Will I be pestering my parents and step mom way more than I ever have before? You got it.

I wrote this post to share with you not just whats been going on lately, but also to get it off of my chest. I don't know if making something that is so hard for me public is the best idea, but right now it feels okay. I actually don't even know if anything I wrote makes any sense.

Hopefully with this post will come more because I sure do miss writing just for the fun of it!
I'll talk to you soon,
J

2013 Book List

Another year of books! I really did keep track of every single book I read in 2012 and I am SHOCKED at how little I read last year! I feel like I've always got my nose in a book or my Kindle in my hands but I guess it really isn't as often as I thought. I'm definitely going to make sure to read much more this year. As you know I love to read and I want to make sure to do more of what I love to do this year and reading is one of those things. Once again I'm going to keep a list of books I want to read/buy and cross them off as I finish them! Last year I only read 40 books....I'm gonna try and double that this year!

• Steven Tyler - Does the Noise in My Head Bother You?
• Ashley Judd - All That is Bitter & Sweet
• Nicole Richie - Priceless
• F. Scott Fitzgerald - The Great Gatsby
• Lisa Scottline - Think Twice 
• Jaycee Lee Duggard - A Stolen Life: A Memoir 
• Rachel Zoe - Style A to Zoe: The Art of Fashion, Beauty, & Everything Glamour
• Rebecca Campbell - The Marriage Diaries
• Jodi Picoult - Plain Truth
• Nicholas Sparks - Safe Haven
• Nicholas Sparks - The Best of Me
• Kim Addonizio - Little Beauties
• Kathy Griffin - Official Book Club Selection
• Mary Kay Andrews - Hissy Fit
• Alisa Valdes-Rodriguez - The Dirty Girl Social Club
• Lauren Weisberger - The Devil Wears Prada
• Sophie Kinsella - Remember Me?
• Antwone Quenton Fisher - Finding Fish
• Cathy Kelly - Past Secrets
• Jodi Picoult - Mercy
• Caitlyn Duffy - The Rock Stars Daughter
• Christie Craig - Divorced, Desperate, and Delicious 
• Jodi Picoult - Vanishing Acts
• Lori Foster & Others - The Gift Of Love
• Jennifer Weiner - Swim
• Sara Shepard - Ruthless
• Sara Shepard - Stunning
• Sara Shepard - Burned
• Sara Shepard - Pretty Little Secrets

Talk to you soon,
J

2012 Book List

Now thats its a new year I have decided to start my book list over! I am not only going to keep track of what books I want to read, I'm gonna go ahead and (try to) keep track of EVERY book I read! Then at the end of the year I can see how many I actually ended up reading in a year! Fun right?! So anyways, I went ahead and transferred over the books that I haven't read yet from the 2011 list and I added a whole bunch more that I plan on reading! This may be kind of silly but I think its neat to share this with everyone! =) Maybe it will inspire you to start reading more as well?!

• Stephen Chbosky - The Perks of Being A Wallflower
• Sara Gruen - Water for Elephants
• Suzanne Collins - The Hunger Games
• Suzanne Collins - The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
• Suzanne Collins - The Hunger Games: MockingJay
• Christopher Ciccone - Life With My Sister Madonna
• Nicholas Sparks - Three Weeks With My Brother
• Nicholas Sparks - True Believer
• Nicholas Sparks - Nights in Rodanthe
• V.C. Andrews - Flowers in the Attic
• V.C. Andrews - Petals on the Wind
• V.C. Andrews - If There Be Thorns
• V.C. Andrews - Seeds of Yesterday
• V.C. Andrews - Garden of Shadows
• Tucker Max - Assholes Finish First 
• Farrah Abraham - My Teenage Dream Ended
• Tucker Max - Sloppy Seconds 
• Tucker Max - Hilarity Ensues
• Catherine Coulter - The Cove
• V.C. Andrews - Heaven
• V.C. Andrews - Dark Angel
• V.C. Andrews - Fallen Hearts
• V.C. Andrews - Gates of Paradise
• V.C. Andrews - Web of Dreams
• Tucker Max - Sloppy Seconds
• Mary Campisi - Not Your Everyday Housewife
• E.L. James - Fifty Shades of Grey
• E.L. James - Fifty Shades Darker
• E.L. James - Fifty Shades Freed
• V.C. Andrews - My Sweet Audrina
• Jennifer Weiner - Best Friends Forever
• Lisa Scottline - Look Again
• Jennifer Weiner - Goodnight Nobody
• Jennifer Weiner - The Guy Not Taken 
• Jennifer Weiner & Others - Girls Night In  
• Emily Giffin - The Diary of Darcy J. Rhone
• Kris Jenner - Kris Jenner...And All Things Kardashian
• Sylvia Day - Bared to You: A Crossfire Novel
• Sylvia Day - Reflected in You: A Crossfire Novel
• Kendra Wilkinson - Being Kendra: Cribs, Cocktails, and Getting My Sexy Back
  

Talk to you soon!
J