Baby Books

Remember those? You know the things you bought/received as a gift when you were still pregnant and had every intention of filling every single blank out. Writing every little memory down as they happened.

I dont know if you other moms out there are anything like me and just got a little busy with diaper changes, nursing, crying, cleaning, and cooking to remember to write down when your little boy first shook his booty to some Michael Jackson. Or when your little girl first learned to give you a sloppy drooly kiss.

Both of my kids have a baby book. They're the typical fill in the blank type of books. And for the first few weeks when they spent so much time sleeping I was able to fill those blanks in. Now though, they sit neglected in my laundry room right next to my stand alone freezer, mocking me. They laugh when they see me in there switching over the laundry or getting some meat out of the freezer. They know I can see them there every day...but do I grab them. No....I don't. I just turn my back to them and keep doing what I have to do.

Sooooo....I have decided that I am going to buy two of these things.

This is probably one of the best Mothers Day gifts a mom with motivation can receive. I of course will take matters into my own hands and buy it for myself, but regardless...I will have it, soon.

Its called Project Life and it is one of the coolest scrap booking things you can get. It comes with little cards that you insert into sleeves. There are spaces for the hundreds of pictures I print on a regular basis, and there are so many different color patterns! I just love it. I will get one of these sets for each of my kids and force myself to sit down once a month to put that months happenings into it.

My kids are the most important people in my life and I should be willing to make time in my hectic schedule to make sure that I can get the memories that are going into my heart onto paper. That way when I'm gone they have something to look back on that tells them the stories that I wont be there to tell.

Talk to you soon,
J

P.S. If you're interested in these albums and other products click HERE to learn more.

A List of Sorts

I want to make a list.
I want to make a list things I want to buy.
I want to make a list of things I do everyday.
I want to make a list of places I want to go.
I just want to make some lists.

So I thought I'd share.

Today though I want to just give you a rundown of everyday in my life so you can get a feel for just how busy I get.

6:45 a.m. Wake up because Bella is an early riser (unlike anyone else in our family)
6:46 a.m. Pee and then brush my teeth
6:49 a.m. Get Bella from her crib, change her diaper, sit her on my bed while I get dressed.
7:00 a.m. Wake Max up
7:05 a.m. Try and get Max up again, pick out his clothes, bribe him, threaten him, uncover him....anything to get him up
7:15 a.m. Tell Max this is the last time, and then scare him into thinking he's late for school. So mean, but so effective.
7:25 a.m. Make Max and Bella some breakfast, feed it to Bella, call Max's name about 100 times until he comes out of his room fully dressed.
7:50 a.m. Brush teeth, this is a battle with both kids. Max doesn't like the flavor of his tooth paste and Bella doesn't know why I'm torturing her like this, etc..
8:00 a.m. Sit down at the computer, check my email, check my Facebook, remind myself what homework I need to do.
8:30 a.m. Start rounding the kids up to get them out the door. Put the kids in the car, run inside 5 gajillion times because I keep forgetting stuff.
8:38 a.m. Finally drive away from my house to drop Max off at school.
8:44 a.m. Wait outside the door because Max's new teacher refuses to let us in, no matter the weather until EXACTLY 8:45 a.m.
8:50 a.m. Drive to the convenience store on the same street and pick up a Red Bull because by this time I'm ready to crawl back into my bed.
9:00 a.m. Come home, hang out with Bella watching T.V. or playing in her room.
9:30 a.m. Lay Bella down for her nap
9:32 a.m. Do homework, write a blog, check my Facebook and email again.
11:30 a.m. Get Bella out of bed, change her diaper, and put her in the car cause its time to go get Max.
11:40 a.m. Sign Max out of school, drive home, ask Max about his day, gauge his temperament for the rest of the day.
11:50 a.m Make Max and Bella lunch, do the dishes, start a load of laundry.
12:30 p.m. Hang out with the kids, watch a movie with them, play a game.
On Tuesdays and Thursdays I leave at 1:00 p.m. for my on campus class.
3:00 p.m. Pick up the house again.
3:35 p.m. Greet my husband when he gets home from work and follow him around the house while he tells me about his day and does the various things he always does right after work.
On Wednesdays at 4:00 p.m. I clean a different house.
6:00 p.m. Figure out what I'm going to be feeding my army for dinner.
6:45 p.m. Serve whatever I've made, do everything I can to get Max to eat his food.
7:15 p.m. Put both kids into the bath and get them out within 7 minutes. Yes, I'm a PRO.
7:22 p.m. Get Bella dressed for bed while Max is getting himself dressed.
7:45 p.m. Put Bella down for bed. Sit on the couch and sigh...one down, one to go.
8:00 p.m. Make Max get into bed against his will. He just wants to play for a little bit longer mom!
8:10 p.m. Sit on my couch and take in the momentary silence.
8:11 p.m. Max wants to hug and kiss me.
8:20 p.m. Get on the computer, check my email, check my Facebook, do some more homework.
8:22 p.m. Max wants another hug and kiss.
8:45 p.m. Max wants another hug and kiss.
9:00 p.m. Give up on my homework for tonight, sit down to watch a show with my husband, get interrupted like a thousand times because Max is stalling on going to sleep.
10:00 p.m. Shower and get into bed to read while Ryan is showering.
10:30 p.m. Out like a light.

In between all of this there is still 7,628,764,918,742 diaper changes, 234,556,398 juice and milk refills, 3,452 phone calls or text messages, visits from friends, 91,284,129,847,129,074 loads of laundry that sometimes aren't even mine because I do my mom and brothers laundry on Sundays and the laundry for the family whose house that I clean on Thursdays. I spend something like 6 hours a week paying bills and doing our budget, 15 hours a week doing homework, 25 hours a week cleaning and re-cleaning my own house, 2.5 hours a week cleaning another house, probably about 4 hours a week keeping my kids from fighting, and about 12 hours a week cooking or feeding them and my husband.

This is my life and I have no complaints. I'm glad that my kids will be able to say that their mom did it all at one point in time and still managed to keep smiling (most of the time haha). I'm glad that I can help people, that I can do something nice for my mom and brothers, and that when I get old I can look back and know that even though I wasn't getting paid in money (most of the time) or working at a company, I was working and getting paid in love and smiles.

However...to anyone who thinks staying at home is lazy or not any work, you must have lost your mind. I've never had a job that worked me more than staying at home with my kids has, nor have I ever had a job that has been more rewarding than this one is and will continue to be.

Talk to you soon,
J

Thankful Thursdays- 21

This verse just spoke to me this morning.
A wife of noble character is her husbands crown, but a disgraceful wife is decay in his bones. --Proverbs 12:4

CAN I GET A HALLELUJAH!!

I am thankful for many things every single day. There are some days that I am so thankful that I feel like its going to burst right out of me. These are some of those things...

201. that this semester is almost over. I'm exhausted.
202. that Bella is finally starting to talk a little bit.
203. for Ashley H. who always has something good to say.
204. for Max's school where he is learning so much everyday.
205. for the fun that we had on the Monday after Easter.
206. that my husband is working day shift now.
207. for long time friends who care viciously about your feelings.
208. for the text messages from my husband that make me stop whatever I'm doing and swoon. (LOVE my hubby!)
209. for the encouragement I get from my sister in law.
210. that we no longer have to buy 2 different kinds of milk!

What are you thankful for this week?
Talk to you soon,
J

Egg Fun Day!!

What do you get when you cross, four kids, four adults, 30 something hard boiled eggs, about 200 plastic eggs, 4 boxes of different egg dying kits, cupcakes, and insane wind??

A MESS!!

I have been planning an egg "hunt" for my kids and my best friends kids for a few weeks now. It was my first shot at it and I think it turned out great!
I filled just about 200 plastic eggs with different candies, and 3 bigger eggs with special stuff for the big kids. Then I basically placed them all around my back yard because there really isn't very many places to hide them. By the time I was done it looked like a blimp filled with eggs had dropped a bunch from the sky, so I was pleased.
Last night I made a batch of carrot cake cupcakes and iced them with cream cheese frosting. I told Chace that I made this kind because the Easter bunny likes carrots so I wanted to make sure he liked them...he just said "I know" with a mouthful of his second (yes I spoil him) cupcake. I also boiled 16 eggs last night. Evette boiled like 18 and we ended up with a whole bunch of them. So today all I had to do was wait for everyone to come over and for Ryan to get off work and the fun began!!

Evette and I got all the different cups of dye together and set up the table while the kids played around for a while. While we were doing all this I attempted to make "dinosaur eggs". I basically rolled the eggs around on the counter enough to crack the shell but not make it come off, then I just put each one into its own cup of dye and let them sit until all the fun was over and it gave the kids one last WOAH! =D
So the kids got messy dying eggs and then we went out and hid them while we made the kids wait in the house hahaha!! Then after I gave them all their special eggs we let them loose on the yard!! It took about 10 minutes for all the eggs to be found but it was so worth it! We came back in to let the kids eat some of the boiled eggs and look through the plastic ones and then I served the cupcakes!

The "dinosaur eggs" were a major hit!! Atalaya and Max wanted to eat one right away but Chace decided against it, thats the first time I've seen him turn down food...ever!

Overall the day was so nice. I could have done without the wind but oh well. I was surrounded by people that are not just my friends but are my family and I was overcome with love and joy in my heart to have so many people I love in one place.

I hope you all had a great Monday as well.

Talk to you soon,
J

Resurrection Day Weekend

or Easter Weekend...whatever you want to call it!

This weekend has been pretty amazing.

Saturday-
We attended an Eggstraviganza, thrown by a church in our city. They took over one of the bigger/nicer fields around here and put up all kinda of little carnival type games, an egg hunt, and a few big inflatable relay race things. They also provided a free hot dog lunch, we didn't take advantage of that because by the time we got done with the egg hunt Bella was super crabby.
After that we went home and got ready for Eden's second birthday party! It was moved to one of her relatives houses because of the terribly windy weather, but it was still a ton of fun!! It was Ni Hao Kai Lan themed and it turned out super cute!!
We got home around 6ish so it was time for dinner, baths, and bed for the kids. Allison hung out for a while playing one of my new addictions with me, the Lego Harry Potter game for the XBox 360. What a huge waste of time but I don't care, I love it!

Sunday-
We woke up at the usual 6:45 with our early riser (Bella) and as hard as I was trying to keep her out of the living room and away from the Easter baskets it didn't work. So around 7:30 we woke up Max so the kids could open their baskets together, and boy was that fun!! Max was pretty pumped about all of his goodies and Bella was all about showing Ryan everything she took out of her basket. I kind of got my feelings hurt because as a mommy I want my kids to be thrilled when I take a month out of my life to make sure I get their baskets just right, with the perfect toys, and their favorite candies in the perfect basket. So when I dont get what I was expecting I end up a tiny bit hurt. My kids were pumped but there were just somethings that I thought they would be super pumped about and they were just like "eh" hahaha!!

Anyways, after the baskets we got ready to go to church and celebrate the real reason we have an Easter holiday! We gave thanks to our Lord who sacrificed himself and then rose from the dead to save us all and show us that with him we would have eternal life. There was an amazing demonstration of all the ways that Jesus saves lives. Several members from the church participated in this sharing their stories of hopelessness only to show us what He did in their lives to turn it all around. It brought me to tears to see these people being so honest and grateful to our Lord.
After church we came back home to meet up with my mom and brothers, my grandmother came by also. Max's biological paternal grandparents stopped by with an Easter basket for Max too. After visiting for a little bit and trying to let Bella get some rest we decided to go to Denny's for lunch since neither my mom nor myself wanted to cook haha.
The night ended with me baking cupcakes and boiling eggs, Ryan playing his game, Max playing with his new toys, and Bella just trying to get in everyone's business (lil' nosy).

Overall this weekend was fantastic!! We had a lot of fun with our family and friends, we gave thanks and glory to God,  and we made some good memories, I couldn't ask for anything more than that.

Today we are doing some more fun Easter stuff with my best friend and her kids because unfortunately they weren't available yesterday to do anything with us. Even though it isn't on the day of Resurrection, we can still celebrate like it is!!

Talk to you soon,
J

Thankful Thursdays- 20

"Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths." --Psalms 25:4-5

This week has been CRAZY! Over the weekend we had the pageant, then this week was filled with laundry, homework, and housework. I've still managed to find time to be thankful for things like...

191. that my husband is finally working a morning shift.
192. that when its close to time for him to get home I STILL get butterflies.
193. that God has gifted me two seriously smart children.
194. for Lisa who is never without an answer, and has faith that I can do something that I'm so terrified of.
195. that even though Bella didn't place in her pageant division, I can move on and look forward to next year when she might.
196. that for some reason even though I have such a terrible time in one of my classes, God is giving me the strength to get through it with a good grade.
197. that just when I think I know whats best for our life, God shows me exactly what HE knows is best and what HE has planned.
198. for technology.
199. for my mom, who taught me without knowing it, to give and give and give.
200. for sudden moments of clarity where you realize whatever/whomever has been bothering you really doesn't matter.

What are you thankful for this week?
Talk to you soon,
J

Hatred.

I want to talk a little about hatred.
I steer way clear of saying that I hate PEOPLE. I may hate a thing, or a food, or a place, but I definitely make it a point these days to remind myself that no matter how much I may dislike the actions of a person I do not hate that person. That's not to say that I don't sometimes really feel like I could hate someone, because I do, I'm just saying that I try my hardest not to. In the Bible we are told over and over again not to hate. We are told not to speak slander on other people, which admittedly is a hard one, but we are still taught against it.

It says in Ephesians 4:29-32 "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."

Now as much as I do not want to do anything to go against what God is trying to show me or teach me I am still a human being and most of all I am still myself. I have come a long way from where I used to be in regards of speaking ill of people but I can only do as much as I can. I take these verses from him and I remind myself when I feel the need to pop off at the mouth and I hold my tongue. I believe that God knows my soul, and he knows that I try.

What is the point of hate? What good does an emotion that has no effect on anyone but ourselves do for our lives. If it has no place in our lives, and does not better our relationships (with ANYONE) then why do we feel it? Do we just feel such an intense rush of anger that our brains automatically translate it into hate? If we are able to get that angry then we should be able to reverse the feeling just as quickly. I say if you're feeling like you hate someone, tell yourself you don't. There is no reason to. What can this person do to you that is so bad that you want to go against what the Lord is trying to teach you? Can this person let you into Heavens gates? Didn't think so.

That was just my quick thought for tonight.
Talk to you soon,
J

Thankful Thursdays- 19

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you...Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. --John 14:26

This week has definitely not been one of my best. Instead of letting everything around me be soiled by my foul feelings, I just kept on praying and kept moving forward. This has helped me make sure to be thankful for all that I have.
Like...

181. my Church family that welcomed me with open arms.
182. the power that Gods word has over my soul.
183. that I got to sign Max up for a book exchange program.
184. that I booked my first party!
185. that Max teaches Bella so many things that are so very funny!
186. the O'Rourkes that always listen and always care.
187. also, for Pat, who is always telling me SOMETHING that I didn't know.
188. the people who bought tickets to Bella's pageant.
189. coupons!
190. the recent business that has overtaken my life. It's nice to feel like I have a life again.

What are you thankful for this week?
Talk to you soon,
J

I've Got the Fever...

BABY FEVER!

I don't know if it's the changing weather, the fact that it seems like everyone around me is getting pregnant, or that my kids are getting so big so fast, but I've got a major case of Baby Fever.

All I can think about these days is having another baby. I think of baby names. I consider calling my OBGYN to make an appointment to remove my IUD. I plan my baby shower in my head. I don't know what it is but having another baby just sounds like such a good idea sometimes.

Then I think about how I do not want to have an odd number of children. I don't want my kids to have to share rooms (they would have to right now if I were to have another). I dont want to go through another c-section. Now it's not sounding like that great of an idea.

Ryan and I already decided that if we were going to have any more kids it wouldn't be until Gabriella is either fully potty trained...or she was in school. Chances are by the time that gets here, I definitely wont be wanting another baby considering the freedom I would have to work all morning while the kids were in school. We also want to be living in a house that we own with extra rooms, just in case. I want to have a steady job to add a second income. I think that if Ryan really had it his way, we would already have had another baby, lucky for me though, I'm in charge of this body haha!

I'm not missing much thank goodness. I have my little boy and my little girl. So I am able to have the best of both worlds. If I didn't have one of each gender I would most definitely be having another. I was blessed though so unless God has it already written for me that I will have another baby whether I like it or not, I probably wont be having another.

Thank goodness for blogging, I just talked myself out of calling the OBGYN. =)
Talk to you soon,
J

Some Scripture

Yesterday wasn't one of my best days. The day before that, it wasn't going so well either. More and more I am turning to my Bible to lift my spirits and let God lead me to the answers I'm seeking. Yesterday morning I attended church for the first time in literally four or five years. I've never been a fan of church because when I was younger I really felt that God and church were being forced on me and I wanted to make my own decisions regarding religion. I didn't like being forced to go to church with people I didn't know and in an environment that I wasn't comfortable in. So I turned away from things of that nature. Now all these years later I feel like I have found my place with God and I am ready to hand myself over completely to him and let him take complete control of my life.
I was invited to church by the O'Rourke family. This couple and their kids are amazing. They have qualities that I haven't seen in another married couple and I totally admire them and honestly feel so drawn to them. I accepted the invitation faster than I could even get it out of my mouth and looked forward to it. The last time I went to church I felt like the pastor was speaking directly to me and it kind of freaked me out. The words he was saying hit so close to home. Once again at a completely different church the words of this pastor had me in chills. I didn't want the service to be over. I think that this is God's way of saying "Come back, every Sunday, come back and let me fill you with the words I know you need.". So you know I'm going back next Sunday!

I wanted to share some of the scripture that touched me yesterday.
It is from Romans 12:9-21

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.
Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this you will heap burning coals on his head."
Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

I'll talk to you soon,
J

Delete.

I absolutely love social networking. Just like I love blogging, I love Facebooking too. I love to share my world with everyone else, and I love being a part of my friends' world.

Normally I only add people that I KNOW personally. I went out on a limb though and added a few people that most likely wouldn't talk to me if they saw me in a public place. Mistake. I was becoming kind of suspicious that not only were people that I didn't want looking at my things but my so called "friends" were giving their password so that other people could see my profile. Let me back track for just a second. I never used to block anything. Back when Myspace was cool it was public, when I first made a Facebook it was public. But then things started happening and people started being crazy and stalker-ish. I didn't feel comfortable knowing that people who openly disliked me were able to just gander at my profiles all day and sit around criticizing or whatever. I mean honestly I don't care too much what they have to say, I care that their lives are centered around trash talking my family and myself. Those kind of things don't have to be said directly to you, word gets around and eventually we all find out everything.

So on to the reason why I am writing this. Yesterday I decided to go ahead and delete anyone who hasn't spoke to me in public when I have seen them, or interacted with me on Facebook in a while. This way I can weed out anyone who I feel would break the unspoken trust I had in them when I accepted their friend request originally. I also made sure to delete people who don't add positive into my life. Living this new life with no negativity is trying enough already, I don't want to make it harder right now by having bad/mean people in my personal life.

I just thought you might want to know my reasons for doing that and I hope you all have a beautiful weekend.
Talk to you soon,
J

Thankful Thursdays- 18

I know I have probably used this in another blog post, but it will never get old for me.


Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
--Matthew 11:28 

This week, even though my stress levels have been pretty high I am still thankful for everything in my life, like...

171. my computer getting fixed so fast, even though I was missing it really bad for those few days.
172. that I will never have to deal with any other girl/woman trying to be my kid's mom.
173. that I have extraordinary will power.
174. that I was able to book the two flights we need for the next few months.
175. that I am graduating in May.
176. that I have confidence in myself in every aspect of my life.
177. that we have so much planned for this summer. It is going to be a blast!
178. for my wedding anniversary that just passed. I am blessed to have my husband and I love to celebrate it.
179. that even when I am too tired to finish, I get what I have to do done.
180. that my priorities are always in the correct order. God, Husband, Kids, School, and then everything else.

So what are you thankful for this week?
J

Step Parents.

This subject can be quite touchy to a lot of different people.
I have a step mother myself and I was raised by a step father and my mother. I have had PLENTY of experience with step parents so I am not coming into this subject blindly. First I want to warn you and let you know that I do NOT think all people were meant to be parents...or step parents for that matter. I also want to warn you that even though I am going to try and word this as nicely as possible, it may get a little ugly.

Let me first tell you a little more about my background. I was raised mostly by my mother who was a single parent until I was like five. She married a man who I called daddy because I wanted to. He helped raise me and was in retrospect not a very good man. He was good at taking care of his family, but not good at being a husband for my mom, and because of the way he was raised he wasn't very nice to me or my brother who also wasn't his. My mom divorced him when I was eleven and she was once again a single parent. Now, my dad married the woman who is still my step mother when I was two years old. She was young and had no children of her own. When I was spending time with my dad she was there and she did her best to be a step mom...not a MOM, a step mom. Because she has been in my life for so long, I have heard all kinds of stories. They had a glass coffee table because they didn't have kids in the house full time and I heard about how frustrated she would get when right after she would clean it I would toddle over and put my sticky little hands all over it. Her and my father have been married for almost 23 or 24 years now. There are a few ways that these things have impacted my life. First of all, watching the marriage my mother had with my step father really shaped the way I react to things in my own life, and the way I manage my relationship. Second, being raised for my adolescent and teenage years by a single mother taught me how to look at life a lot more realistically than other people do. And last, because my dad has been married to the same woman basically my whole life it has shown me what a step mother is supposed to be like.

Now as for another experience in MY OWN life with step parents lets talk about Ryan and Max. Maximus is not Ryan's biological son...as most of you probably know. I think my circumstances in this situation are way different than most people who are not with the other parent of their children because Max is the product of literally, a one time thing. I have long ago shaken the embarrassment of that whole situation and accepted it as the path God wanted me to go down. Now, I really am not into bad mouthing Max's biological father because I would never want him to do that to me. What I will say though is that he is not in Max's life, no phone calls, no visits, nothing. His court ordered child support is garnished from his wages automatically and he lives his life. Everyone in life makes their own decisions and this one is his. Moving on from that, because of the lack of relationship between Max and his biological father there has been room for Ryan to be the father Max needs. So I can't really say I view Ryan as Max's step father, to me there should be another level of relationship. Ryan isn't Max's blood but you wouldn't know any better if I didn't tell you or if you didn't hear about it from somewhere else. I want to tell you what it would be like if Max's biological father were in his life...but I can't. I have no idea what that life could be like or how it would change our family dynamic. I do know that I would definitely implement guidelines to make sure that the other parent in the situation never felt disrespected by myself or Ryan.

This brings me to my next point. Step parents should ALWAYS and I mean ALWAYS think about how they are affecting the actual parent in this relationship. No step parent should ever TEACH a child to call them mommy or daddy, I do feel like every parent feels differently about this and some may not mind but as for myself, if I had even this slightest feeling that my child was being manipulated by someone like that, there would be some issues. Kids should really be taught to think for themselves and make those kind of decisions on their own with no pressure from anyone. Another thing is that step parents need to think of how they would feel if the shoe was on the other foot. How would they feel if their daughter came home from their dads house with her hair half gone when they themselves weren't there for the first hair cut? Not so good, and some of those step parents might even say that if the shoe were on the other foot they wouldn't allow the kind of things that they do to the other parent of the children. So how, honestly, HOW can these step parents go on being so rude, disrespectful, and sneaky to the other parent?


Now after visiting a little with the bad side of step parents lets talk about the good. There are some step parents that are just normal. They know their boundaries. They respect the relationship the child has with their other parent. These are the kind of step parents that I think the world should be filled with. These are the parents that have no ulterior motives. All they want to do is love the kids, because as we all know, a child can NEVER have too much love. These people were raised with a strong sense of respect for people in general and will use that in their everyday lives therefore applying it to their position as step mother/father. These are the step parents that are friends with the other parent, the ones who will come to functions but step back and let the actual parents do what they have to do as mom and dad.

I feel like I can type about this forever because after seeing my best friend be put through the wringer with regards to the step mother of her children I have a lot of feelings on the subject. As I said before though, we all make our own decisions in life and we all decide how to handle the situations that are thrown at as. Not all of us will do what someone else would do. Not all of us would handle it with grace, some of us would just haul off and beat someone down. So I will stop rambling now because I know this was long and I honestly dont even know if I will even keep this up for good. I'm not trying to make waves, I just have been wanting to get this post out there. I hate that people think Ryan is doing everything I criticize other step parents for doing when in reality they dont know that Ryan is only doing what no one else is doing for Max and that is being his father.

I tried my hardest not to offend anyone and I hope I didn't.
Talk to you soon,
J

I'm Trying!

I feel like I have been neglecting my blog. I like to try to write something at least three times a week but honestly I have no energy to do it after I've done the homework for my five classes on top of everything I do as a mother and a wife. I keep telling myself, Jacqui, just do it. It never takes you long to crank out a good blog. So I sit down and I try to write, then I get distracted by this or that, so I get off the computer. For example I started writing this particular blog early this morning and it is now 6:00 PM and I am barely getting back to it. I think blogging for me is like a diary. I know it may seem crazy but writing things out is just kind of relieving for me. I like to talk to people anyways, and being able to do it to such a wide (well not that wide) audience is nice. It gives people a glimpse into my world and an idea of how I look at life. There are so many things that I want to talk about but to sit down and type them out in a way that wont offend some people is kind of time consuming. Like, I really want to write a blog about step mothers, I haven't actually tried to do it yet though because it is going to take a lot of energy to write about something that is so touchy to so many people.

So maybe after I'm done with all of my homework for this week I will sit down and give you my view on step motherhood. But until then, I have to get back to my school work and my actual responsibilities. I just wanted to post a little something to make myself feel better haha!

Talk to you soon...PROMISE.
J

Two Years and Counting

"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." --Genesis 2:24

Today I have officially been married for two years. 

Some may say, "well two years isn't even that long", and to them I say; You get married and let me know in two years if it already feels like you've been married for a life time. I say that not in a negative way at all. I think that if I am feeling like I've already been with Ryan my entire life it must be a good sign. It must mean that I was really meant to be with him for the rest of my days. Never have I had doubts of any kind but to know that it was meant to be makes this reality even better.

What I want to tell you today is what my husband has given me this last year. Ryan has given me more love than I ever knew a man could give. He has given me his arms when I needed to be held, his ears when I needed to be heard, and his hands when I needed his help. My husband is a wonderful man. Even as time passes and my particularness (I don't even know if thats a word haha) about some things gets worse and worse he continues to oblige me and understands that there are just somethings that have to be re-done. He puts away the laundry without me asking (Good man!). He gets up nearly every morning and takes Max to school. There are so many things that Ryan has done in the last year that I could go on and on about but I wont. I'll get to my next point.

In the last year our relationship has grown by leaps and bounds. No one is born knowing how to be married, we are taught by the marriages we see growing up, the marriages that we see on the television, and the marriages that we read about. We eventually figure out the kind of husband or wife we each think we want to be and teach ourselves what works with our relationship and what doesn't. Ryan and I have taught each other things we didn't even know about each other and what we expect out of our marriage. Together we are learning every single day how to maintain the happiness we have right now. We have never wanted to be the couple that is hot as fire in the beginning with all the passion in the world, but then just fizzles out after a few years because thats when reality will kick in. We have always made sure to keep a steady flow of passion and heat going that way it will never run out.That's not to say that all you need to make a marriage last is passion, you need much more than that as I'm sure everyone knows. That was just an example of how we know we will last forever. I have so many words about love and marriage inside of me that I feel as though this might not be making much sense...oopsie. I am really just trying to tell you that I love my husband, plain and simple, easy as pie. I love that man more than I could have ever dreamed of loving any man and I love that we have a day to celebrate our love and the commitment we made to each other when we said "I Do".

So after rambling, probably aimlessly, I have one last thing to add...
Ryan and I are in it for the long haul and I'm proud of it. He is my King and I am his Queen.
So Happy Anniversary to the love of my life and the man God himself created to be a perfect match for me.

Here's a few pictures of our history.

"So they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, no human being must separate."--Mark 10:8-9

Talk to you soon,
MRS.HILL

I Have a Five Year Old?!

WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN??!!

Was it while I was going to school?
Was it when I was working my tush off?
Was it while I was busy keeping a clean house and taking care of a newborn?
Time with Maximus has gone by quicker than ever these days. Days filled with laundry to do, food to cook, diapers to change, and honestly just a lot to do everyday.
Sometime in the daily chore list that we call life my little boy grew up. He can spell his entire long long name, he can count really high. He knows all his shapes, colors, letters of the alphabet. He has become one smart little cookie. He is almost as tall as me and more handsome than I could have ever imagined. His stories brighten every day and his laughter can fill the whole house.
As I was baking the cake for his actual birthday I was thinking about all of this and thinking about how far just Max and I have come since his first birthday. We have managed to find a good father figure for him and a good husband for me. He has gained a little sister and I a daughter. Max's life has become more and more charmed as he has grown and I know with every passing year it will get even more charmed.

I thought we could take a little trip down memory lane and I would share a picture from each of Max's past birthdays!

One Year Old!

Two Years Old!

Three Years Old!

Four Years Old!

And now Five Years Old!!

Talk to you soon,
J