Kindergarten

Today marks week two of Max's ascent into a real school life.

Pre-school for three hours a day was one thing, kindergarten for like seven hours a day is completely different. I wish I could say that this chapter of his life was something that I wasn't looking forward too...but I'd be lying. Like I talked about in the post I wrote when he started preschool, I have been looking forward to being the best "PTA" mom I can be. I love helping with anything they ask me to do and even doing things that aren't asked of me. I am (and I know Max is too) adjusting slowly to him being away from me for all these hours a day. It breaks my heart that because I am working I see him so little when he is awake. I want to be able to be there every second of every day for my little big boy. Unfortunately/fortunately working has kept me from doing what I want to do for my kids. I still have to check myself to make sure I dont complain for that though because there are tons of parents that wish they could have a job, I used to be one of them. I also know that this is just temporary and I'll be back at home with my kids all day everyday soon enough.

So anyways, kindergarten is where Max is going to be making friends with the kids who should be graduating high school with him. I am going to be watching these kids grow from four and five year olds into seventeen and eighteen year olds. There is something about Max walking into his real class room, at a real elementary school, with a real kindergarten teacher that gives me the urge to run through his entire life mentally. I want to make sure that as his mommy I have given him all the tools he needs to be successful in school and in his social life. I want to double check to make sure I've taught him right from wrong and that he knows good from bad. I pray that I've done the absolute best job I could in the last 5 years.

From here on out I am going to make sure I instill in him the importance of his education, that I encourage him to be himself, and that I give him all the love he could ever possibly need. I am so very very very proud to be his mommy and I am looking forward to the next 18-20 (hopefully) years of school!

Our Tradition

Covering the imus in his name...he says hes just Max

Talk to you soon,
J

Thankful Thursdays-31

I thought I'd go ahead and take a lighter approach to my TOAT this week...even though I know it isn't Thursday (again). OH WELL! 

Let's talk about LOVE LOVE LOVE! This week I decided I would let you guys in on a few of the hundreds of things I'm thankful for when it comes to my husband. With everything that has been going on around me, I have become increasingly thankful for him.

"I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where, I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep it is your eyes that close." --Pablo Neruda

I'm thankful for...


281. the words he uses to tell me this is forever.
282. the time he takes to make sure I know he loves me.
283. the loads of laundry he's been doing since I've been working.
284. the foot rubs he gives me before we go to bed.
285. that he knows how tired I am and when he's home I get to sleep in a little longer.
286. the promises he never goes back on.
287. the excitement he shares with me about our future.
288. that sometimes I just need to vent...and he gets it.
289. that he loved me before anyone else, never stopped, and never has to.
290. the forever we have left to go...

What are you thankful for this week?

Talk to you soon,
J

Follow Up With A Vampire

A while back I did this blog Interview With A Vampire with a friend of mine named Ashley. Now she has had her baby girl and I thought I would ask her a few questions and give her a forum to tell her birth story. I dont know about you but I love to know how having kids was for other women. So I asked her to tell me her story and then asked her a few questions.

So lets start this blog with your birth story Ash! Give us a many or as little details as you'd like!
--My birth story...where do I start?! I had contractions the whole night of the 2nd of August but decided that I didn't think it was time to go. Then on the 3rd I was talking to my great grandma and my mucous plug came out (I know, gross!!) but Victor was in the field (eek!) so he didn't get service. Not knowing what to do so I called a friend to find out if I should go to the hospital right then. She said just chill out, wait for stronger contractions and for my water to break.I finally was able to get a hold of Victor when he got back onto post and he rushed home. All I wanted to do was to go to Los Domingos and have chips and salsa... soooo off we went to Domingos. :) after that I decided it was time to go to the hospital.We get to St. Marys and I wait over an hour to get into triage. I get checked and I'm at a 3, fully effaced, and the baby's head was at a +1. I thought alright here we go!!! Wellllllll, I was told to go walking for 2 hours and come back. So we went on what seemed like the longest walk of my life! I was in my hospital gown and flip flops and my nips kept showing cause the gown was so huge! Lol!!! Awkward!! I get back and my water was leaking. They decided to admit me, this was at 10 pm on the 3rd, I didn't actually get admitted until 2:02 am on the 4th. Then "labor" started. I immediately showered when getting into my room, I felt totally grubby from the 2 hour walk, but also the shirt I was wearing earlier that day stained my skin and I was freaking embarrassed!! Lol! I got an epidural at 4cm, I was told I could have received one at anytime but their morning was booked with C sections so if I didn't get it then it would take hours and I could miss my chance, so I went for it! Not as bad as I thought it to be!! I laid down at about 4 to get some rest and I was at a 5. They hooked me up to the Pitocin drip and by 9 am I was at 8-9am I called my mom and told her to "hurry her a$$ up!!!, it's time" my dr came and checked me, turns out I was only an 8. So the nurse tricked me... dang! But that gave my mom, grandma, and sisters time to make it to the hospital. The minute my dad got there to watch my youngest sister (she was too young to come in) it was time to push. But where in the heck was my dr?! Why were they telling me to stop pushing!!?! Ohhhh my dr was in a c-sec operation (btw, he LOVES c sections!!) so I was made to wait over an hour and then finally he showed up at 11:11, it seemed like it took him forever to set up and I was FREAKIN DYING to push!! I started pushing, pushed about 20-25 times and at 11:41am our little 6pound 12 ounces, 19 inch long princess had arrived safely!! :)

No downs syndrome, no weight issues, no problems WHAT SO EVER! To think I spent almost 10 months worrying daily about this little baby who came out better than I could have ever  hoped for!!! The entire room was in tears, the nurse and my husband included :) The Hubby said I cried so loud. I could only imagine. (I guess that's why my voice was gone for the next 2 days) It was amazing!!! My husband kept repeating "thank you for our baby girl, thank you!!!" and I kept asking my sister If she was for sure healthy even though I had already held her and saw her for myself I didn't want it to be a dream and me be making it up that she was okay just to trick myself. She reassured me, Aislyn Destiny Meneses was perfectly healthy with all her expected fingers and toes! Once I heard her apgar score was 9.9/10 I was pumped and stopped bugging everyone about whether or not she was okay :) anxiety got the absolute best of me, for no good reason!

I am so very happy for you and Victor that all the things you got scared with during your pregnancy had no place on/in your baby. Thank Jesus! 

How would you say your relationship with Victor changed now that Aislyn is actually here?

--Our relationship has actually grown tremendously in just two weeks. We've gained an even greater respect for each other and I love him even more than I did before!!! When I'm tired he's really good at making sure he does extra. I love him for that...however, for the time being romance is kinda out the window! boooooooo :-/ lol

The time without romance will go by faster than you can even imagine! But the way a GOOD man changes after his baby is born is just beautiful isn't it?

Was labor and delivery anything like you thought it would be? What is something unexpected that happened? How did you handle it?
--Labor and delivery went so much better than I expected!! I was so scared, but it went great! I expected to be in there for 20+ hours so only being there for 9 was awesome!!!
Ummmm my unexpected/awkward moment:
I had a student paramedic in the delivery room, it was his first time seeing a birth, (awwwwkkwaarrrdddd) they didn't even ask if he could come in, but at that point I wanted to push so bad I could have cared less if the damn president was in there lol. He was holding my foot as I was pushing, and he was doing a terrible job at it!! Poor kid probably wanted to puke or pass out, I know I would have wanted to!

So now that you've been at this whole motherhood thing for a few weeks now do you have any Words of advice and/or encouragement for new moms out there?
--Moms: babies are really resilient!!! You don't have to be "as careful" as you think!! I'm not saying toss them around like rag dolls, but you can change their clothes without feeling like you'll break them! The ABSOLUTE most important thing is to follow YOUR own rules!! You know your baby best! Enjoy all the little moments, even when they're fussy, cause it goes by quick... I'm already seeing that :( and take millions of pictures!! :)

You're nursing right? Is there any advice you'd like to leave soon to be moms with that may be scared about that part of motherhood?
--  Yes ma'am im nursing :)
Nursing is soooooo great for your baby! Unless you don't have the ability to do it then you should really try your hardest!!! It's not the easiest thing but it gets easier everyday. Don't be afraid to ask for help or do research! You have to wake up in the middle of the night to feed the baby anyways so might as well make it easier on yourself and breastfeed instead of getting up and mixing formula. (which although is close, DOES NOT give as many benefits as BM) Pumping sucks! I'm not even gonna pretend it's fun, but, it too gets easier and then you'll have your milk to go so that feeding your breastfed baby in public is easy!!

Are there any last tidbits you'd like to share with the world?  
--My last bits of advice are, 90% of the stuff you pack in your hospital bag won't even be used, so don't sweat that like I did!! Also be patient...it's all a learning experience.    

Ashley and Victor's little girl is absolutely gorgeous! I hope to be adding a picture very soon.
Look for more updates from Ashley as Aislyn grows!

Thanks for reading!
I'll talk to you soon,
J

 

 

Thankful Thursdays- 30

I know it isn't Thursday...so sue me. I didn't have even one second free yesterday to do my TOAT...so I'm doing it now.

As of late there have been things happening around that have me scratching my head and saying...does God have a reason for doing these things to the people I love? This has to be a part of a bigger plan that I cannot see right now...right? Every day it seems as though my heart cannot be hurting much more for these people and yet every day it seems their troubles get worse and worse. I have no idea why but I get over invested and I take the bad things that happen to my friends and family really personally. Even when I have absolutely nothing to do with a situation I still take it to my soul and my heart breaks a million times a day when I hear the tears or see how scared they get. Maybe thats why I'm no good at consoling the weary...I am weary as well. Maybe thats why I dont know how to comfort the broken hearted, because I am broken hearted as well.

These last few weeks have had me in my Bible at every chance I get looking for rhyme or reason to these things and once again I am guided to this...

As Pharaoh approached, the Israelites looked up, and there were Egyptians, marching after them. They were TERRIFIED and cried out to the Lord. They said to Moses, "Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt? Didn't we say to you in Egypt, 'Leave us alone; let us serve our Egyptians'? It would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians that to die in the desert!"
Moses answered the people, "Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today will never see you again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only be still." --Exodus 14:10-14

And then the Lord parted the sea to let them through and closed it on the Egyptians...if you dont know the story.

In the face of all the pain my loved ones are going through I am reminded to be grateful for all that I have and I continue to take note of what I have.
I am thankful for so many things...

271. for our jobs...some people cannot find one at all.
272. for the health of my children.
273. for my marriage.
274. that I know who I am and I dont need the validation from other people to make me feel good. Yes it sucks to know the things people assume about you but it means nothing.
275. that Max will be starting Kindergarten in just a few days and I am confident that he is ready for it.
276. that I am going to be able to take a trip with Ryan and share new things and experiences with him.
277. that I became fast friends with the girls I hardly knew before we started working together.
278. that I never have to lie...to anyone. I am confident in my truth no matter what.
279. that we have the means to feed our family.
280. that we have a car...it may not be the best car, or the nicest...but its a car.

Remember to be thankful for everything you have, you never know when it can be taken away from you.
Talk to you soon,
J

Okay, One More Update

Today is my day off after 6, 8 hour days of working in a row. I am completely drained but I am extremely thankful for the opportunity to work. I was blessed to even find a job so you will not catch me complaining. I've been trying to learn a new balance in my life because when you go from being a stay at home mom to a working mom life gets kinda busy. Thankfully my husband is a huge help and doesn't complain that I can't keep up with everything everyday like I normally would. Instead he does what he can to make sure I am never overwhelmed.
I have so many things I want to blog about and I feel really guilty that I haven't been able to make the time in my day to write a real blog. I ask you to just please be patient and after I have this house in order and the laundry done I will sit down and talk about something a little more meaningful than my hectic schedule.

I'll talk to you soon...promise,
J

We Were Only Freshman

Let me start with a little history.
In the three years I was in middle school (6th grade to 8th) I went to four different schools. I went from Ft.Irwin, to Barstow, to Texas, back to Barstow, and then back to a different school in Texas. My mom divorced my step dad when I was 11 and it made a major impact in my life. We had to move from where I had finally learned to make friends, to a new place where I knew no one. I started in the middle of a school year during the 6th grade at a school where I was a stranger. I had a hard time fitting in anywhere and it showed. Long story short, I bounced between my moms house here in California and my dads house in Texas. I dont know why moving me around seemed like the solution to either of my parents, but thats what happened.
So as you can imagine, I was pretty much on my own starting high school. I had one consistent friend at the time, J, who went to Barstow High School but of course I didn't end up at that school. My mom thought the environment of BHS would only make my rebellious nature worse, and she thought I would end up in too much trouble, so I started high school in yet another school where I was a stranger, Silver Valley High School. It is the local high school that is reserved for students from Ft. Irwin, Newberry, and Yermo. I think she figured if the military families had their kids there it must be good. WRONG. I got into more trouble at this school in one year than I did in the next three years at BHS. I'm not going to detail all of my troubles because the point of this is not to embarrass myself all over again. I just want to share what high school was like for me.
I'm sure that most people can relate to the nervous feeling of walking into a classroom where you know no one and everyone knows everyone. Not only was this my first year of high school, I was also walking into it all alone. For the first few weeks I was regarded as "the new girl" (annoying since I have a name), and I had a pretty rough time making friends that were really interested in really being friends.
When things started turning around I found myself having a core group of friends, C, R, A, H, & S. The latter of the four S, was a really good friend but she wasn't as good of friends with C, R, and A. H and I were from two different walks of life but I thought she was a so nice and so was her family. I cherished every friendship I made because I had by that time become well versed in the art of losing friends. C, R, and A were an amazing few girls that always made me feel like I was really their friend.
Moving on, there are only a few things that stick out in my mind from my freshman year of high school that I can say kind of impacted my life at that time. First was a theft that occurred. Of course it was small but at the time it was the absolute worst thing that could have happened to me. I had taken about three cameras worth of pictures at a school dance and also some a few days after. My mom paid the money to have all of these cameras developed and for doubles to be made so I could SHARE them with my friends. The day that I brought them to school I left them in my backpack (naturally) and I didn't think about them again until lunch when I wanted to pull them out and show my friends...when I went to do that, they were gone, and I was devastated. How could someone steal them from me...and why would they want to?? It was a mindless "crime" that did nothing but make me cry. Months later when our yearbooks came out, some of those pictures were in it. I still have no idea who did it, but I will always have my suspicions.
Another thing that kind of shaped the way my future would be was my first experience with alcohol. It was a New Years Eve party that my mom was fooled into letting me attend (sorry mom!!) I was only 14 (going on 15) at the time and I was totally duped into drinking. I used to be a major sucker for peer pressure and I just wanted to fit in with my friends and I drank some of the most disgusting drinks ever and got drunk. I threw up every where and passed out. Not so fun. I wouldn't take another drink for a few years.
One last thing that happened that I will absolutely never forget is how after all of the work I had put into that school year with regards to friends, I ended up nearly alone again. I dont know the details exactly but I do know that when I left the school for what I didn't know then would be the last time I would be at that school. I started the summer with only two of the same friends H & S. In my memory I cannot recall a reason that our friendships all faded away but they did. Now though after more than ten years has passed I am once again friends with every single one of those amazing girls and so very happy about it.

My freshman year can be summed up in a somewhat short paragraph. I went in very very scared and I came out the same way. I tried my hardest the whole year to make a place for myself within the school cliques and I didn't succeed. Luckily I got through it alive even if I was a little emotionally scarred. Looking back now I know that the small things I went through during my freshman year would be a drop in the bucket of the next three years of high school.

Update Update Update

I thought that after my classes were over I would have time to not only relax all day with my kids but to also get everything ready for us to move...I was wrong.
Last Thursday was my last day of school, but I haven't had a chance to just chill out yet. I've been running my brothers around for this reason or that reason, getting caught up on my house work, and helping a friend out.
I just found out that I got a temporary job so now everything will have to be done around that schedule. I am so not complaining about that because I have been praying and searching for any kind of job for months and I'm getting what I asked for, I'm just filling you in on whats new. =)
Ryan and I should be into a house of our very own by November and I'm trying to get a jump on things now that way we can move into the house with no junk!
So now that I've caught everyone up to speed I must get off this computer and get the kids ready to leave so I can take my brother to another meeting at the college.
I bid you aduuuuu (hahaha)

Talk to you soon,
J